Things are good right now. I feel like I've finally figured out some important things in my life. Thoughts that have plagued me before are more or less taken care of now, and I feel like I can move on.
For instance, I was very worried about whether or not music was right for me. It is such an uncertain career path, and to be quite honest, I was afraid. I have a bad habit of doubting myself when I need personal fortitude the most. With some good advice from one or two key people, I feel like I'm back on track. I work my ass off, and I feel results. One thing left that must be dealt with is my particular studio. I adore Dr. Koon, but my gut tells me that I'm not learning as much as I could. I hate thinking that way, but I've always trusted my intuition, and it really hasn't ever led me wrong. I have to talk to him Monday about taking consultations with other professors...I'm sad to do it, but it's a must. I just hope he understands, but even if he doesn't, I need to be proactive with my life. My career is of the utmost importance to me right now, and I will do what I can to succeed.
Another thing that I've dealt with (or have emotionally compartmentalized until a later date) is crap with my father. I've realized that some things can't be helped, and you can't change the past, no matter how much you want to. What's done is done, and the only thing that I can do is move forward with my life.
Christmas break is coming up, and I'm stoked to spend it with my friends and family. Granted, I'll miss my extended family from school (love you all dearly:-*), but nothing beats sitting at a Starbucks with your four best friends, drinking coffee and talking about life. i miss them so much! I have a feeling that "sex and the bin" shall be a lifetime committment. Andrea's my eternal Carrie Bradshaw. Words can't even begin to explain how much she means to me. Sarah is my Charlotte York, the sensitive friend you can always rely on to make you chocolate chip cookies when you've had a shitty day. Molly is Miranda to the core, analytical and brilliant in all that she does. These girls are incredible, and we always manage to get into some kind of trouble. Whether it's offending old people at Friendly's, getting lost in Saratoga, or just filming random documentaries about the auspicious and scenic "Bin," we always manage to make amazing memories.
I'm going on a rant right now, but for the first time in a long while, I've felt truly content with myself and what's going on around me. We'll see if this continues. Anyway, I must be off. Feminist paper to write and whatnot...hehe.
Ciao!
