Well...hehe

Religion is Like Wine:

Too much will kill you for sure.

Long before that it makes you stupid, tedious to have around, and a danger to yourself and others.

In moderation it makes many people happy, which is reason enough for it, I guess. Too bad even a little makes some people mean. It just makes me sleepy.

Some claim it has health benefits. Maybe so, but I can't help wondering if grape juice would work as well.

If you enjoy it, and can handle it, go for it. But I won't be joining you, and I'd rather not have to say so twice.

Really, drink up. I'll be happy to have you around until you get annoying. Just remember, if you turn into a loud-mouthed asshole or start a fight, the wine is no excuse.

Finally, if you ever find it's ruining your life, and can't quit by yourself, I'm here to help.